Wonderland

Standard

cozy-places-to-read

Sunday.

Lazy day.

The only day I get to have a lazy day. I work Monday through Saturday, and even after leaving the office I stay up until about one in the morning working on my laptop. My family says I’m a workaholic. Coworkers say I need to take a vacation. I don’t need any of that. I need to get him out of my mind. It had been 11 months, twelve days, and… nine hours on the dot since…

Sunday.

My favorite day.

I warm up some homemade hot cocoa on the stove, hazelnuts for added flavor. And just to snack on.

Mmm, cinnamon. Mother gave me these t-lights for christmas. To help me relax I suppose. They work. By the time I sit in my armchair it smells like fall in my livingroom.

Fall… Red leaves falling to the ground. Crunch, crunch, crunching beneath my feet. His almond eyes glowing in the sun… A better time.

Interior design is my job. My hobby. My passion. I go in and make places look… unique. I give a boring four white wall cell, character. I pick up my latest book. Living. That’s what I do. I take inanimate objects, rooms, and floors and give them life. That is my life…

Living.

What does it mean to be living? To breathe? To Laugh? To work? To die?

I am curled up in my gray wool blanket, throw pillow fluffed to my liking, and I inhale the nutty chocolate fumes of my hot cocoa.

There’s a knock at the door.

Six-thirty PM on a Sunday.

No one knocks on my door. I live out a good mile from my neighbors. I need the distance. To be alone. To be safe. Are we ever safe?

There’s another knock.

With reluctance, I set down my porcelain mug onto my sweetgrass tray. My thumb rubs over the chip on the handle. It’s funny how you forget things, but remember the events you wish you could bury. No matter how hard you try you can’t hide away from your own mind… What a terrible thought.

Another knock.

They certainly are persistent. A chill dances up my spine as I discard my blanket. My feet thump thump against the hardwood floor. The gold handle is warm in my hand. And I wonder, why am I so hesitant?

With a swing of the door, like a current raising, he is revealed. His smile is wide, showing off his pearly whites like a cheshire cat. And I know now, all this time, was a waste. There is no escape from Wonderland.

A Picture It & Write Inspiration.

Feels Like Home

Standard

It took you about fifteen minutes to park, I kept busy by writing in my notebook, trying to get all my ideas down on paper so I wouldn’t forget later; because let’s admit it, I always forget come later.

You ease yourself into a parking spot that anyone else would have had trouble with.

We climb out of the car and are welcomed by the ninety-seven degree heat. We embark on our journey just down the road until we hit sand. Immediately, we are greeted with the scent of sunblock and the view of the sun glistening over the ocean ripples.

“Look at the waves,” you awed. They came up in the distance only to break, crashing down just before the shore. I ran off ahead. My right foot stepped into water first. It was chilly, then warm. Each step took me deeper and deeper as the water slapped against me. Then, when I was in shoulders deep, I turned to watch you run through the sand and into the ocean. A big smile on your face as your thick, dark brown hair caught in the wind making you look a joyous and oblivious as a little kid.

A big wave came curling up from behind me. I jumped, with my arms out before me, and rode it into shore to meet up with you. You take me in your strong arms, pulling me against your bare chest, and with my legs wrapped around your waist, you carry me out deeper. Small waves come and go and we hop to float over them, watching them roll to shore.

I’m happy here. In the warm water, under the hot southern sun, with you. It feels like home.

A big wave comes and you throw me over. For a brief second, I’m free-falling, then I hit and sink and laugh. Another one comes and I let it carry me away.

You chose to be defiant. Stand your ground. The waves crash into you and you never falter. Your hazel eyes are locked onto me, squinting in the sunlight. Your pink lips are tight, determined. Your hair is so dark from being wet that it almost looks black and it’s all disheveled from the ocean water beating against you. And the best part about it is, you don’t even know how sexy you look just then.

But I do.

And being here with you, in this new place, it feels like home.

Another Picture it & Write inspiration!

Japanese Maple

Standard

“Late Autumn Japanese Maple” – Mill Valley, California – Ed Callaert – As featured on PhotoBotos

Oh, Japanese Maple
Through your twisted branches I see
Thin rays of sun
Pouring down on me.
You reach up
And out with your spiraled arms
Your trunk thick and sturdy
Rooted in my yard.

Oh, Japanese Maple
The beauty you spread
With your pink hair
Dancing in the wind.
Your leaves,
How they sway back and forth
Like a pendulum
In tune with the beat of my heart.

Oh, Japanese Maple
The breaths you take
You swallow them whole
As your blossoms fly away, away!
Oh, Japanese Maple
The memories you bring
Of the times that have passed by
Sense you were just a seed.

Untitled (2008 Re-Write)

Standard

I actually didn’t touch this song at all because it is one of my all-time favorites. I hope you enjoy!

written 6/25/08:
I search my soul for a song unknown
I want to know why I feel so alone
I start to cry when I want to laugh
I feel so sad life can’t be so bad…

The rain falls
On my head
I know I shouldn’t give in
I believe in true happiness
I believe love is bliss
But I wonder about life’s purpose

I watch the rain clouds move above my head
I wonder if I’ll see them again
I think about my friend and all our fun
I wonder if our fun is gone
Sometimes I fall into a sea
Of memories. Sometimes I make-believe
I’m still young, and have an imagination

The rain falls
On my head
I know I shouldn’t give in
I believe in true happiness
I believe love is bliss
But I wonder about life’s purpose

Don’t you ever wonder, where has the love gone to?
Don’t you ever wonder, who do I belong to?
Do you ever feel alone?
I’m telling you you’re not alone.

The rain falls
On my head
I know I shouldn’t give in
I believe in true happiness
I believe love is bliss
But I wonder about life’s purpose

Don’t you wonder about life’s purpose?

Like An Echo

Standard

My breath was like an echo

Bouncing off the walls

The water dripped off my hair

Pinging on the aluminum floor

I wrapped my arms

Against my bare chest

With a shiver

Droplets rained.

I pushed back the memories

Burying them deep away.

From this moment on

I will pretend nothing ever happened today.

My breathing, rasp, was like an echo

Ringing in my eardrums.

 

A _picture it & write inspiration!!

Time and Time Again

Standard

Memories swirling around me like wind

I still remember the contours of your skin

Under my fingertips, lips on lips

Burning passion, flaming desire

To tongue kiss, a hit and miss

Trying hard just not to get caught…

 

I still think about you now and then

Don’t really want to but I can’t seem to help it.

Trying not to think about how you left me broken hearted

Time and time again

 

Winter air takes me there, to that night I remember

Our breaths were cold, our tongues were warm

I did not know it was the eye of your storm

Would not have taken your hand

If I had known what I was in for…

 

I still think about you now and then

Don’t really want to but I can’t seem to help it.

Trying not to think about how you left me broken hearted

Time and time again

 

Trying to forget about the pain you brought my way

Trying to forget about the days I was happy

Because they were always followed by sorrow

You only brought me trouble

 

I still think about you now and again

Don’t want to, but I can’t seem to forget

I try not to remember how you left me broken hearted

Time and time again

 

Worn-Out

Standard

When you fall in love

You cannot fall out

Is that why

You make me want to shout?

I want to scream

At the sight of your face

At the moments we shared

Gone to waste.

I want to shriek

At the energy spent

Trying to figure you out

And your sly comments.

I want to squeal

With the frustration you brought

With the precious memories

You forgot.

I want to yell

To the heavens

For giving me a reason

To cry.

When you fall in love

You cannot fall out

That is why

My heart is worn out.

Help Me

Standard

Gather up

The broken pieces of my soul

Throw away

All my memories that are cold.

Put together

The puzzle of my heart

That was

Shattered by a dart.

Fix up

My lost sight

Help me

Find the quickly dimming light.

Whisper to

Me stories of endless love

Lie and

Say life isn’t tough.

Promise me

True love exists

Show me

The fireworks of the perfect kiss.

Give me

A rose without thorns

And cry

When there is no reason to mourn.

My Broken Memories

Standard

So she sang to me
“My little Sunshine”
and you tell me
“I’ll love you all the time
Little girl don’t you fear
Your daddy will be right here
who’s that watching outside your window?
Daddy, that’s right you know”

bridge: then they handcuffed you and took you away
she gave me a kiss and said “I’m so sorry”

chorus: and the waves crashed down around me
and you kissed me softly
“Goodnight, I love you, goodnight”
the dark ripped at my heart
as a child I fell apart
do you even know?
the pain still threatens to show
my broken memories

As I grow older, stronger
you’ve somehow made me weaker
like I’m living in an endless winter
you use to say, together
we could melt the snow
but do you even know?
How I live in fear
Afraid, one day you’ll actually show
I’m a helpless deer
In the headlight of your vehicle

bridge: then they handcuffed you and took you away
she gave me a kiss and said “I’m so sorry”

chorus: and the waves crashed down around me
and you kissed me softly
“Goodnight, I love you, goodnight”
the dark ripped at my heart
as a child I fell apart
do you even know?
the pain still threatens to show
my broken memories

As I’m sprawled across the floor
It’s mom who find me here
Letters in my hands
and I won’t let them go
she asks, “Honey, what’s wrong?”
I’m trying so hard to hold on
How come you can always make me cry
even when you’re no where’s in sight?

Then I remember when

they handcuffed you and took you away
she gave me a kiss and said “I’m so sorry”

chorus: and the waves crashed down around me
and you kissed me softly
“Goodnight, I love you, goodnight”
the dark ripped at my heart
as a child I fell apart
do you even know?
the pain still threatens to show
my broken memories

You’re the nightmare I’m reliving

My broken memories

I still can’t listen to this song without crying.

Remember

Standard

My absolute  favorite. This was  originally written as a poem, but the words work well as a song also!

Sometimes we forget

People and faces

We forget names

And memories fade

But I want to be that girl you remember

When you hear our song

You’ll think of the time we spent together.

I want you to remember

The good, and the bad.

Don’t forget the times

We were happy

And the times we were sad.

You won’t forget

A single detail

Or the places we went.

I will always remember the warmth of your skin

And our precious moment, frozen in time, together.

Sometimes we forget

People and faces

We forget names

And memories fade,

But one of the the things we’ll always remember

Is each other.